Centenary Celebration – Pauline’s Perusals

It was quite a step of faith for me to head off to Cheltenham for Ablaze UK ( we used to know it as the Penygroes convention)   this year  celebrating a hundred years since the founding of the Apostolic Church UK.

We were in celebratory mode. Balloons and cakes and the joy of meeting old friends, and then settling into the main hall where thousands of us gathered for wonderful times of worship and hearing from God.

If you are into technology you can hear the ministry on line. Gone are the days when Pastor Frank Parker would write a report, illustrated too, for the Riches of Grace, and though we had attended we loved to be reminded by reading it over again. Once Frank retired I would type out the notes I had taken and send to missionaries etc who could not make it. But this year it will only be titbits, since often I cannot read my own writing because of my ‘shoogley (shaky) shoulder’.

So here I am, home with my (usually) friendly computer, and I would like to reminisce a little.

No, it was not Penygroes, but even when we were still in Penygroes, people would say, ‘Oh, it is not like it used to be.’ I used to think this, even if I did not say, it, until the Lord convicted me. When I first came, back in 1956, I  thought the convention week was heaven on earth. Fast forward to 1981, now married to Joel, I met a couple there for their first time, and they were as thrilled as I had once been. Through them, God was  showing me, it was I who had changed, not God. I realised that if we come to meet God we will never go away disappointed.

So now, a (comparatively) elderly lady, in these excellent premises of the conference centre at Cheltenham, we raised our voices in joyful worship and had those quiet yet powerful times of worship and singing in the spirit that had so thrilled me in the Temple in Penygroes all those years ago. Maybe we did not have a surfeit of prophetic ministry that had so thrilled us in days gone by, but God still speaks to us, for it is always through his word.

It was those times of holy worship which have kept me through times of spiritual dearth in the church, times of dryness and recession, times of loneliness and when it seemed my prayers would not be answered, and I know the God of the Mount is still with us today.

I had such an experience on Sunday night. I had been thrilled as I first arrived, first to meet Joyce, from Ghana who became such a dear friend when living in Ilford, and then yes –  I met a party from Papua New Guinea. No, not anyone I knew, for I left there back in 1972. But they were so delighted to meet me and I told them, ‘You must be my children, for the people used to call me ‘the little children’s mother.’ Oh! Oh! Big photo shoot. So many selfies. Joy abounding! But my strength was ebbing away. Maybe I should not have come.

What a joy to meet up with the family of Pastor Jones Williams, who together with pastor Dan had been a pioneer in the church. Now his children had met up for this special celebration. We had been together in the Barking/Ilford assembly when we first came into the church and such a joy to meet up now. We were booked into the same accommodation so had some special breakfasts together.

In the convention we found Ilford  much in the news.  Bryon Jones, their pastor, led the worship and told us of the  expansion which has meant them leaving the church we had seen, or even helped to build. I found Byron’s workshop on Worship to be a special blessing, and noted it was several  of us ‘old originals’ from Ilford who were making contributions here.

I didn’t get to all the excellent workshops. I no longer feel I have to get to every event, but it was such a joy to meet up with so many faithful souls who have prayed for us over so many years and lovely to have time to chat. Look out for the  magazine we brought home with us bringing us up to date with news of Action Overseas, as our Missionary movement is now called.

Though much was made of us reaching our centenary, in no way was it suggested that we  had reached our goal. ‘A Missional People’ was our theme, and we are still looking for the 40 nations and reminded of our calling to ‘belt the globe.’

Pastor Emmanuel Mbakwe welcomed us – he, with Helen, has been such a humble yet powerful leader, and godly example to us all, but now he was passing on the baton to Pastor Tim Jack, God’s gift to us from Australia. By the way, the baton which had been taken around all the churches in UK now completed its journey by cyclists  from Hereford, who had brought it the last 30 miles.

Pastor Alistair Matheson gave the opening ministry, ‘Just say Yes.’ – how Peter always had to say yes – eventually, and we have to say ‘Yes,’ for God’s will to come to pass. Abraham had to say ‘Yes,’ and his yes meant doing something about it for Sarah to conceive.

Sunday night we had an amazing testimony as Todd White presented the gospel. Often mistaken as a Rastafarian, he was not everyone’s ‘cup of tea’ – though much appreciated by those present from Teen Challenge.

I had been struggling with my health and wondering if I had been wise to come, and now he called us to worship the Lord and reach out to him for healing. God heard my cry. I woke up with the same weaknesses as before, but I was a new Pauline. Before, when people had asked how I was, I would tell them, ‘Well my inner man is alright,’ or maybe ‘I walk by faith,’ but now I told them with confidence, ‘Oh, aren’t we being blessed?’ I was in no doubt I was meant to be there, and so grateful to those who had made it possible, for though I still drive, I don’t go that far.

We had a special centenary choir, led by Bryon’s sister – one of the Jones Family that used to sing in Penygroes, all those years ago. They were a great blessing.

Then there were meals arranged for all our overseas visitors, and retired staff etc. I was amazed at the logistics of such an arrangement. 5 huge buses to carry us to the school where they fed us, and then to get us back to our various lodgings. The wonderful ladies from Kennington were on the look out for any who were struggling with walking. I was so thankful for the beautiful ladies who would take me past the queue, seat me and t hen go to fetch me a beautiful meal. Some of the high lights for me – sitting on the bus with Dario, such a lovely clown from Italy; sitting with the whole Parker tribe for dinner, and then  chatting with Alan and Sandra, from Malawi, on the bus coming back. And meeting the party from Ghana. Another photo shoot!

The logistics of organising the whole conference was amazing, yet all was done with love and grace, yes, and peace. What a privilege to be there.

-        Well, just a few thoughts from my scribbled notes.

Sun. a.m. John Gass, spoke from Daniel, being tenacious in prayer. He spoke of Wilberforce, encouraged by Wesley not to give up and 45 years later, 3 days before he died,  anti slavery laws were passed.

Monday afternoon there was Mission Cheltenham. The sun came out. The choir was there, and our lovely clown, while teams mingled and chatted and prayed, and at least one young man responded to the Gospel.(No, - I was not there!)

Dr.Aaron from Ghana gave a challenging message – that we are called as labourers, and God is saying to us, as to Isaac, when the enemy kept on filling his water supply with stones – ‘go dig another well.’

Pastor Dominic Bird took workshops on evangelism. He was so humble and joyful and didn’t put us under condemnation. But he spoke of Jonathan & his armour bearer – ‘Perhaps God would do something’ – he was willing to fail. If you don’t do it when you have nothing, you won’t do it when you have everything.

No nap Wed. afternoon. It was the big Ladies meeting – Embrace, (while the men had their own in another venue with a Danish pastor)

We had two inspiring testimonies, one was a middle aged lady who has been wonderfully used in personal evangelism, and then the struggles of a young pastor’s wife. Our speaker was Fiona Castle, thrust into ministry through the death of her famous husband Roy. With many commitments herself she challenged us sometimes to throw away our ‘to do’ list and not to be afraid to relax.  (I had taken my latest poetry book with me. I was so blessed in being able to give them away, and this gave me the opportunity of a chat with Fiona.)

We were all sent home with a gift. I now have a tiny heart shaped blackboard with the name of my neighbour written on it hanging with my keys, so every time I come down stairs I see her name and pray for her salvation. Yes, we are a missional people.

As usual, there was wonderful provision for our children and youth, and we so enjoyed seeing them bring their contribution in the final session. Well done to our wonderful children’s and youth workers.

Our new President, Pastor Tim Jack, brought our time of blessing to a close with a strong word from the Lord, Not to be like the king in the O.T. who built ships – but they never sailed, but to rely totally on God who alone can quench our thirst and give us the Holy spirit in such measure that we will be a missional people, to carry the whole gospel to the whole world.

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So now I am home, feeling I am convalescing. Well, even Jesus came down from the mountain, and it has always been so, only with maturity we understand that we do have to come down, and face spiritual warfare. But we have been obedient in making the effort to join with the great congregation to go up to the mount of the Lord. Our gatherings are still ‘Pen-y-groes’ – for the name means ‘ the head of the cross.’ And we look forward to that great gathering when from every tribe and kindred and tongue we will cry, ‘Salvation to our God and to the Lamb.’

I wrote the following sitting in my bedroom at the Premier Inn where I stayed:-

FURTHER ON

Further and higher is the cry

Eternity the reason why

E’en from our mansion in the sky

‘twill still be further on

So on we climb from day to day,

Upward, for we’re on the upward way

In Christ, the Truth, the Life, we say

It’s always further on

So onward, ever upward cry

No, not the grave but Christ on high

Each day his gift – ‘there’s more’ we cry

Yes, always further on

From every kindred, tribe and tongue

We’ll join to sing the glad new song

Of those, the blood washed, to the Lamb

With him, still further on

IT’S FURTHER ON

I was comfortably seated in the lounge of Prior Park, this prestigious mansion where we had gathered for the reception of a very special wedding. But I wondered why a friend was asking if I had been outside? I presumed he wanted me to be part of the taking of photos, but - I was not anxious to be included, even if I did have a new outfit. But once I had stepped outside, I understood.  To think I might have missed this magnificent view! As I gazed in awe as the spectacular scene I was reminded of the final book, and indeed final chapter of the Narnia stories.

‘It’s further on!’ This was the cry they heard as having come through the stable door of death, they were urged to run, gallop or fly ever onward, ever upward. Finally they came  to realise that this  was heaven itself.

For our newly-weds it may have felt like heaven as they stepped outside, but they had not needed to be urged to go further on. As I gazed in awe at the glorious scene of the valley which fell away before us into glorious vistas, I saw that far in the distance, central to the picture, they were already there, with the photographer, of course, to make sure the scene was one never to be forgotten.

What a wonderful day; such a homely, yet awesome service, with friends and family making it a time of joyous celebration, and the newly-weds dancing out of the church together into newness of life. And now enjoying such a wonderful time of fellowship and feasting too in this grand mansion, with old friendships renewed and new ones forged. But we may be assured that neither bride nor groom will have to look back on it as the best day of their lives. I am sure they will remember it as God’s very special gift to them; their entrance into a life of joyful service, but always knowing that God has more, and hearing the call,  that it is ‘further on and further up.’

And as I stood there, on the balcony, I knew that God was challenging me to remember we have none of us as yet arrived. There are more mountains to claim, more challenges and difficulties which he wants to turn to a testimony, more weaknesses to be turned into strengths, and above all the promise;- ‘You have shown us the path of life. You will make us full of joy in  your presence.’

May God  bless our newly-weds as they have stepped into abundant life together and as they, with us, answer the cry, ‘Further on and further up.’     

AN ANSWER TO PRAYER

It was a very little prayer, but what a great answer. I was returning home after a wonderful holiday with ‘Bridgens Tours.’ It wasn’t just the weather, the food, but especially it was the fellowship which makes me describe it as wonderful. We were nearly thirty in our party, - some have become part of my history, and others newly discovered, but all members of my family through Jesus. So now, yes, I would be glad to return to my own bed, but how could I face an empty house?

When I was so happily married, I had felt I could never stay in my bungalow if Joel were not there. He always filled it with sunshine. But as I faced returning to an empty house for the first time, -thirteen years ago now, Jesus brought a memory to mind. Out in the highlands of New Guinea, I was standing on the veranda of a mission house, watching the truck driving away with my colleagues. I would only be alone for the weekend before my sister would be there to keep my company, but oh, as I looked at the grass lands stretching to the distant mountains and no house within earshot, how desolate it seemed. ‘Oh Lord,’ I sighed. What kind of a prayer was that?

Turning to go into the house, suddenly I knew Jesus was there, beside me. Filled with joy, I began to sing, and then I was dancing. He was keeping his promise, ‘I will never leave you or forsake you.’

As ‘this same Jesus’ reminded me of this story from long ago, I knew he would do it again. So now, every time I put the key in the door of my home I ask him, ‘Be there for me, Lord,’ and every time I step into joy. Every time, Jesus is there to greet me.

But now, having waved goodbye to all my lovely family, I was drugged with tiredness after the long bus journey. Would I fall into a pit of depression? Again I prayed, ‘Be there for me.’

‘Hello Pauline, I’ll help you with your case.’ I had not had to ask. My lovely neighbour had seen me drive in, and soon had my case on the mat and was giving me a hug of welcome. And, oh yes, as I picked up the mail (that had always been our first job) I found not one, but two very special snail mail letters, -what I call ‘proper’ letters.

Two very ordinary happenings, you may think, but because I asked, and God had answered, it became a very special welcome home.

I am so thankful that we have a God who hears and answers prayer, and who has promised that he will never leave us or forsake us. Yes, it does say, before you call I will answer, but I know he loves to hear his children call out to him.    A very little prayer, and a very special answer.

SEATED WITH CHRIST

If we are asked to take a seat, that should give us a measure of security. We are welcome. But to be seated with Christ, that is beyond human understanding, but not beyond faith. 

The first time I met Esther, she was seated alright. We were at college and a friend wanted me to meet her. She took me to her room. We heard a clear ‘come in!’ but - where was she? As I entered I could not locate her until I lifted my eyes and there she was, perched on the round back of her sturdy office chair which was against the wall, her feet on the seat. Somehow it was much too ordinary to sit as anyone else of us would do. 

I’m sure that, as a child, Esther thought sofas were meant to be bounced on, or chairs to be made into tunnels or even castles. Life was not meant to be ordinary, but exciting. 

No wonder she entered with joy into the life we are offered in Christ, and she set out on a life of adventure with God, working for over twenty years in Africa.. Yes, she knew what it was to be seated with Christ in heavenly places. 

So how could it be that now, in her old age, she did not know how to sit down? Eventually she realised she did not have to perch on the arm of her chair but dared to yield herself to the comfort of its seat. 

I was grieved to see the deterioration of my dear friend, such a great women of God, but my companion assured me that she was not unhappy in her dementia. Indeed this friend she loves to drive me over to visit Esther as she is so blessed by hearing her sing. Once we get her singing the wonderful songs she learned in Sunday School, or in her early years in church, we have a little bit of glory. Her voice is still as strong as in our college days where she was chosen to sing the solo parts of Bach’s glorious chorales. Perhaps it is no wonder she doesn’t know what to do with a chair after misusing them for so long, but she knows a wonderful security in her relationship with Jesus, and she is still seated with Christ in heavenly places.

JUST ONE LONELY LAMB

Driving out of the estate of Cricket St. Thomas, made famous for the filming of  ‘To the Manor Born’ we had enjoyed a break with Bridgens Tours, but now, packed into our comfy minibus, we  noticed this one solitary lamb. What was he doing there all on his own?  Obviously some days since his birth, for his legs were strong, we knew he should not have been alone. All week we had enjoyed watching the  flocks of sheep, their little ones gambling around or suckling contentedly.

We had nearly driven through the gates  when we caught a glimpse of an elderly shepherd. He already had a  newborn in his arms. Doubtless he was intent on taking it home to the farmhouse where his wife, maybe, would care for this helpless little one when he had spotted the wanderer, and was now striding purposefully towards it.

No, this one was not in need of the warmth of the kitchen or of a nourishing bottle, just of being rounded up and sent in the right direction to where it would be reunited with his mother, safe and protected.

How comforting to know that however long we have been walking with Jesus, and though we are still prone to wander, we cannot go beyond the care of Jesus, our good Shepherd.

And perhaps God was using that wayward lamb to remind us that none of us are  meant to ‘go it alone.’ Yes, all we like sheep have gone astray, but the Good Shepherd has brought us into his flock and into his green pastures, and is far more concerned for each one of us, that we should not stray beyond his care.

MY TELEPHONE FRIEND

There is an English speaking fellowship in the south of Spain, where everyone knew that Brenda had a telephone friend.

Well, that is how it started out. Another friend, also living out there, was very concerned for her. ‘Can you imagine anything worse’ she asked me; ‘to be blind and in constant pain?’

Well, yes I could. Whatever our circumstances, if we have Jesus we have everything. There are some who may have their health, wealth, home, but if they are not loved or appreciated, and if they are constantly abused, even just verbally, how wretched is their condition? That is, unless they have Jesus in their lives, to bear their pain and pour in the oil of consolation.

Those were my thoughts, until Brenda told me how she had intended to spray bleach into her sink, but, alas, the nozzle was turned the wrong way and found it had gone into her eyes, causing extreme pain and maybe even more damage.

Loneliness, too, can be very hard to bear, and my heart went out to this elderly lady suffering the affliction of blindness on top of many other ailments.

No, I couldn’t imagine anything worse. I have a special rate for overseas calls, so I asked for Brenda’s phone number.

What a feisty lady I met on the other end of the phone. Full of joy and faith for all that God was doing in their fellowship, and interested too in my circumstances, our time was whizzing by. We kept a date for Saturday evenings, but I had to remember to put my timer on so that we did not overrun the hour. And so, by now I too had a very special telephone friend.

Brenda may have been weak in body, but she was so strong in faith. She had known miracles in answer to her prayers, and though she did not receive healing for her sight, she was not deterred.

She had been so thrilled to tell me that though their fellowship had been through storms, now a lovely Irish gentleman, with his wife, was coming to shepherd them. This was a new beginning and her weekly telephone logs were full of joy, until –

Yes, sadly her dear Pastor seemed to be undergoing personality changes, and at last a brain tumour was detected. ‘But prayer was made’ along the coast, yes, and at the end of the line here in UK too, until the wonderful news buzzed over the wires, that he was healed.

But once again there was trouble in the fellowship. As it says in the parable, ‘an enemy has done this.’ Could it be?

But nothing deterred our Brenda from praying. By now dependant on carers coming in and other wonderful caring friends, she still spent hours in intercession.

I remember how she would laugh about how she and a friend were bouncing at either end of her sofa, but it was no laughing matter, for her flat was at the top of a high rise building. Their part of the coast were experiencing a succession of smaller earthquakes, while more serious ones were threatened. The bouncing may have seemed a laughing matter while a friend was with her, but when she struggled out of bed to find the furniture had been moved out of place through the quakes she felt completely disorientated.

And more serious quakes were forecast and I  remember too how she wrestled with God in prayer, and how, the following week she told me how the expected course had been deflected away from the coast and the lives of many people saved in answer to their prayers.

 But how grieved Brenda was that there seemed to be no further miracle for their dear pastor.  She had been so sure that he was to be the answer to their need in the fellowship. How she poured out her complaint to her Saviour and Friend.

I had known that Brenda might well reach heaven before me, and how could we wish her to linger? But a friend had prophesied that she would see her 82^nd birthday, and I wrote this poem for this special occasion, and she pressed on for a few more months.

I confess I wept when her friends let me know that she was in hospital with a stroke, and where could she go when she came out? But I knew my tears were selfish ones, and it was with thanksgiving that we heard she was safe home. The Lord has been preparing a very special place for her, and a very special reception committee for her too, for only the day before, God  had called their dear pastor, too, into his presence and he would have been there, waiting for her.

We prayed for our dear Pastor Warren and now he is doing well not just in answer to our prayers,  but all in her fellowship had to pray for him (at her command), while there are other of her prayers yet to be answered and I am confident that they will be, since she has entered into the presence of Jesus, the One who ever lives to make intercession for us.

I thank God for this very special lady, and for the privilege God gave me of being her ‘telephone friend.’  So if sometimes the hours seem long and you are in need of a friend, maybe God has a special telephone friend waiting for you to call.

                                    SOLDIER OF CHRIST

Brave warrior, limping, weary from the fight,

As friends we’re gathered here to cheer you on

Not yet, not yet to lay your weapons down

But courage bring to face the last lap home

So let us pause awhile to give God praise

Strong in his strength, though ours may long have fled

Once more together drink this cup of joy

Once more in glad assurance break the bread

Then gladly we will trust you to the care

Of him whose death has won such rich reward

So soon will darkness yield to glorious sight

Of Christ our Saviour, Holy, Holy Lord

LOOKING FORWARD TO EASTER

In the heart of  our land is the Gower Peninsular, one of Britain’s best kept secrets, they say, but in the heart of the Gower is an even greater secret, but one we need to share abroad. On the cliff top, over looking  Oxwich Bay is a very special place, Nicholaston House. Here is a welcome for all who need healing,   refreshing, or renewing of their faith.

‘Looking forward to Easter’ was a special week of preparation for our celebration of Easter, (Passover as some prefer to call it.) What a privilege to step into this house, to read afresh God’s promise  written on the walls of the foyer, ‘In this place you will find peace,’  and to know God was meeting with us in a special way as we were welcomed by the dedicated staff, settled into  the beautiful rooms with views across the gardens to the bay, and oh yes, to be  well satisfied by the delicious meals provided. Our fellow guests had soon become friends, and now we were safe and secure, ready to experience the ministry God had provided to refresh, restore and lead us deeper in our walk with him.

Out of her own experience of healing Helena first asked us all to introduce and share a little of our own walk with the Lord before she introduced the theme of our meditations, which was  Intimacy with Jesus, the shepherd King, the Lover in the story of the Shulamite recorded in the Song of Songs attributed to Solomon.  

Our time together met needs of spirit, soul and body. Those with still strong legs scrambled their way down to the bay, strode, or even puffed their ways to the top of Cefn Bryn while some of us were blessed by a quiet stroll in the beautiful gardens.

The Celtic chapel is a special part of the blessing. Staff and visitors met together each morning for devotions. Not only did God speak to us through his word, but helped us raise the voices some of us   thought we had lost, teaching us to listen too as he blended our voices in harmony, while the spirit of the Lord was present to heal.

We were not just looking forward, but felt we were walking towards Easter as we shared the Seder meal, where we were taught the significance of the Jewish Passover, - looking back to  the Passover lamb who died for them in Egypt, but of Christ our Passover whose death and resurrection we celebrate.

It was a precious meditation as we followed the Stations of the Cross (with pictures placed strategically around the house,) where we read the appropriate scriptures, ending with a time of worship in the chapel, while our last evening together was a very meaningful sharing of communion, our Lord’s Supper.

Good Friday: Our last time of worship in the chapel, and then those who could joined in a united service of local churches, gathering around the cross on the green at Reynoldstone and then carrying it to the top of Cefn Bryn.

As we returned to celebrate Easter Day in our own fellowships, I trust we will remain impacted by the meditations Helena led us in concerning Intimacy: that we will determine to refuse negativity but accept God’s delight in us as the Shulamite had to; continue to experience that wonderful sense of belonging; know he calls us too by name, and  share that deep experience of companionship that those first disciples knew, who shared their lives as friends of the Master. May we press on to know God as Lord, as our tender hearted parent, and provider;  understanding and being understood.

I’m sure we were all deeply challenged as we considered those blockages which may so easily arise, and even as I write to share my blessings, I ask myself, ‘Am I willing to be alone with my Saviour?’ May I, as the Shulamite had to, guard against complacency, and ever keep that spark of first love ready to burst into a flame, and to sing of those ten thousand reasons we each have to bless our wonderful Lord.

Yes, we were looking forward to Easter, but now may we all walk with confidence in the reality of Easter Day. Now is Christ risen indeed.