My Choice

‘I didn’t have a choice,’ I insisted, when my friend expressed admiration that I had answered God’s call to go to the remote highlands of Papua New Guinea. ‘Of course you had a choice,’ she remonstrated. ‘You could have said No.’ Again I insisted, ‘that was not an option.’

This is the story I told her, so now, you judge. Do you think I had an option? You see, for me, it was a case of choosing or denying my Lord.

I was brought up in a religious movement who thought they alone had the truth. They had the answer to everything, even if it did mean twisting or explaining away a lot of the Bible. But they had not taught me that I was a sinner for whom Jesus Christ had died.

Now, wonderfully, I had met with Jesus and knew I was saved. I loved to go with my friend to the meetings in her home, but I didn’t get all the answers there. What was right and what was wrong? How could I know?

In desperation I cried out to God, ‘It was so easy for the first disciples. All they had to do was to follow Jesus, and I am having to find out what is right and what is wrong.’

God answered me, deep in my heart. ‘No, it is just the same for you. It is just for you to follow Jesus.’

‘Lord, if that is true, make it so plain for me that it is either to follow you or to deny you.’

God did just that. When someone said to me, ‘To go to a place where they deny that Jesus Christ is God would be to deny my Lord,’ I knew God had answered, and there and then I determined to leave this fellowship in which I had been brought up. 

From there on this is how I make my choice. I answered God’s call to go to Papua New Guinea, but as the day drew near to go to the airport and leave everyone and everything I knew I felt, ‘Lord, I won’t be able to do it.’

God answered me with a waking dream. I saw him going through the doors at the airport. He told me, ‘I am going. You can come with me or leave me.’ Do you understand now why I say that to say no to God is not an option? How could I leave him who is everything to me?

There have been other times when I felt I could not face what lay ahead, but God has only to say to me, ‘I am going,’ and I know I must go, for I cannot leave him.

I thank God that he has taught me to make him my choice so that each morning I feel I am walking through the day with him , my God, my Saviour and my Friend.

If you are interested to read more of my life story, Wings of the Morning, you can find it on Amazon, or direct from me. My publisher hopes to have it available as an e book in the New Year.

http://ocsw.us/plwotm

DELIVERANCE FROM FEAR

I’m not sure of the special phobia that describes Ruth’s fear of water, but I know I have to write about it in my blog.

Arachnophobia is the name for my own debilitating fear, and I could write and tell you how the Lord delivered me from this, but that would be a tale of far away and long ago. But this is an up to date story of a friend in my age range. A bit late to be delivered, you may think?

‘Grandma, you must come. We can share a cabin and we’ll be two girls together.’

‘I’m sorry, Dear,I can’t. I would be so afraid.’

Ruth’s daughter had planned a cruise for this special anniversary, and insisted she wanted all the family to come. Not just her granddaughter, but her son in law too was begging her to come. How blessed she was that they wanted her. Maybe she should consider it?

But the more she thought about it the more agitated she became and tossed and turned all night.

‘Mum, just ask the Lord to give you peace,’ her daughter counselled her.

Ruth did. That night she slept right through and as she awoke found the words of an old hymn were on her lips. She lay in bed and sang it.

‘Anywhere with Jesus I can safely go.’ And the chorus is, ‘Anywhere, anywhere fear I cannot know…..’

This wasn’t the end of this story. Having agreed to go, she didn’t have her passport, but somehow God smoothed out every problem and she enjoyed every moment of this wonderful holiday.

So even if we have struggled with some phobia for many years, we aren’t too young or too old for God to step in and help us.

David said, ‘This poor man cried and the Lord heard him and delivered him from all his fears.’

Graduation

It was a great privilege to be invited to the graduation ceremony of my great niece, Ruth Anne. I was remembering the day her parents proudly arrived at our house to introduce us to their first, and only child. She was long legged, even then.

And now they all seemed to be long legged, and no wonder, for they were all going in for sports.

I was touched when, at the beginning of the ceremony, they asked the students to stand in acknowledgement of those who had made their studies possible. Yes, indeed, for through the years her parents have given her every encouragement to do her homework, and in every aspect of her schooling. But what a reward for them to see their daughter achieve something that had been denied them.

‘Your uncle would have been so proud of you,’ I told Ruth. God asks us to love him with all of our hearts and also all of our minds. Joel left school without any qualifications because of his poor health, yet God kept him in health to serve him many years in Africa. It was because of the terrorists uprising that he was restricted in travel and so used this free time to study for a BA with the University of South Africa.

Once retired, we both took up further studies, and Joel went on to get not only his MA but also his doctorate. Yes, his graduation was a very special ceremony.

And yes, I am so proud of my niece, but most of all that she has maintained her Christian testimony while at college, and that she and her young man are doing what the Apostle Paul wrote of, ‘purchasing to themselves a good degree’ in the sight of God.

We aren’t all gifted academically, but we all have gifts of one kind or another. They may not be acknowledged by others, but they have been given by a loving God and he will enable us to use our gifts for his glory. There is going to be a wonderful graduation celebration in heaven and maybe we will be surprised at the rewards we receive.